Sorry for the delay. Due to my laziness, I now have A LOT of exciting news to fill you in on. First item of business, the IWU women's track team won the CCIW Conference Championship for the 2^nd year in a row (which is also just the 2^nd time in the history of the program), and our men pulled out a 4^th place finish! There were SO many standout performances. It was the definition of a team effort to put us at the top. A couple highlights that I can remember - Amanda LaRocca scored an unprecedented 46 total points I believe (1^st in the 55m and 55 hurdles and long jump, 2^nd in the high jump, and 3^rd in the 200), our DMR of Ashley Heilengoetter, Jessica Christy, me, and Kerry Devitt qualified for nationals with an 11:56, Kyla Motz had an enormous PR in the weight throw, Darien West won the men's weight throw, and Wally Farris sped through the mile in a 4:15! There were plenty more PR's and point getters, but I'll let you check that out on your own: http://iwusports.com/news/2009/2/27/MTRACK_0227093237.aspx?path=mtrack

 

It's a plane, it's a bird, no, it's Superfan! Fan of the Meet Award goes to my grandma. She arrived at the meet early to set up chairs at Shirk, but unfortunately when she got there, a set of bleachers was blocking their usual spot. This was no problem for Superfan, who simply picked them up and tossed them aside. Superfan and her lovely husband, Gramps, have been to almost every meet throughout my collegiate career. They're pretty great. It was also awesome to see a lot of our highly respected track alumni come back to root us on. Among these greats were Brooke Halcott, Rachel Anderson, Mary Ellen Barron, and The Big Man Nick Burge. It's always a pleasure to see their faces. Even Team McCoy made the long haul from Texas to the bitter cold of Illinois to support their little Alicia.

 

At our last chance meet up in Stevens Point, our pole vaulters, Erin Moran and Alex Lambert, had lifetime best heights. They both ended the indoor season at #17 on the national performance list, narrowly missing qualifying for the meet, but as a freshman and sophomore, that's very exciting for the future.

 

And then came nationals. We had 10 women and 1 lone man making the trip to Rose Hulman in Terre Haute, IN. We made the journey there on Thursday, got in a practice on the track, and then had some fun at the banquet. LaRocca was named Regional Track Athlete of the Year for the Midwest and Coach Shoe earned a well-deserved Regional Coach of the Year award for the Midwest! Already a pretty good showing for IWU before the meet even got started. Friday, we had LaRocca competing in the high jump and prelims of the 55 hurdles, LaRocca and Shavantay Thomas in the 55 dash prelims, Ali McCoy in the 400, me in the 800, and Heilengoetter, Christy, Amy Burns, and Devitt in the Distance Medley Relay. Darien West came up big in the weight throw with a 6^th place finish, marking him as our first All-American of the weekend. As usual, we had the best fan section in the joint. Then I pissed off the whole team by taking 2.5 hours to fill a beaker for a "random" drug test. I really think they just pick out the people that look the most like steroid users. Anyway, the team was a little hungry and tired of waiting, but Miss McCoy was nice enough to leave me an encouraging voicemail. Saturday was a big day for us. LaRocca started us off with a 4^th place finish in the 55 hurdles (8.23). Ali won her heat in the 400 (57.65) to score a 5^th place spot on the podium, which was crazy awesome to watch. LaRocca came back to place 3^rd in the 55 dash (7.11), and then I took the track in the 800 (2:12.64) for a 4^th place finish. The field in the 800 was pretty tough this year, with Ashley Graybill from St. Norbert running a blazing 2:09.95 for the win. At this point, all we had left was the 4x400 relay. We needed a 6^th place finish to tie for a 4^th place team trophy, and 5^th place finish to claim it as our own. We decided to go ahead and cut over 3 seconds off our PR to take 2^nd place behind Wartburg. Ali, Lauren Alpert, LaRocca, and I all ran our fastest splits of the year (I think, not sure) for a 3:52.25! That put us in 4^th place as a team!! Woohoo! Wartburg ended up winning the whole meet with 51 points - very solid team this year. Wisconsin La Crosse and Wisconsin Oshkosh took the 2^nd and 3^rd spots. As if this wasn't exciting enough, we just found out that our very own Amanda LaRocca was name the NATIONAL TRACK ATHLETE OF THE YEAR! That's AMAZING! She's following in the footsteps of our beloved Rachel Anderson :)

 

I'm most likely forgetting a lot of details that I was planning on adding in, but this will just have to suffice for now. And this is far too much to go back and read through to proofread, so sorry about that too. We'll all be heading back to campus this weekend, and we'll start up our outdoor workouts on Monday. We're hosting the Illinois Prep Top Times indoor high school meet next weekend, so we won't be back in meet-mode until the beginning of April. I'll do my best to have some fresh jokes for you by then.

Fantastic weekend for IWU Track and Field. I believe we had 6 national qualifying marks at our last meet in Monmouth. Our freshmen ladies decided to show off a bit, with both Shavantay Thomas and Caitlin Eskew provisionally qualifying in the 55m dash. Erin Moran, also representing the class of 2012, had a big PR and qualifying height in the pole vault, and she had a very nice PR in the triple jump as well. Speaking of HUGE PR's, Kerry Devitt dropped major time in the mile to put herself on the national list with a 5:01. Apparently qualifying for nationals in 5 events wasn't enough for Amanda LaRocca, so she decided to add yet another event to her list. She provisionally qualified in the long jump, and figured she might as well improve her automatic qualifying time in the hurdles before she calls it a day. Disgusting.

This blog is dedicated to the Carmel Twins - "I Kerry a Devitt Card" and "Ashley Heilin-Go-Getter." After both running the mile and Ashley suffering from an annoying calf crampage, they were still willing to be my silly rabbits and pull me along in the 800. They did it perfectly and helped get me to a lifetime PR and automatic qualifying time. So Carmel Twins...muchas gracias.  I love my team. I really do. They're the best...arooooound...nothing's ever gonna keep them down. (Karate Kid reference, anyone?)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Qae_TUTeGo

Other big news - This week's National DIII rankings from the U.S. Track & Field and Cross Country Coaches Association has us at #1! Very cool! Check out the entire list for men and women.

http://www.ustfccca.org/rankings/division-iii-rankings

You're probably wondering the secret to our success. Well, lucky for you, I'm willing to expose that secret. And here it is...

The best coaches in the nation. They have big dreams for us.

And they're very forgiving and understanding as well...

 

As the blog title points out, we don't have a meet this weekend. We're just getting down to business and preparing for the conference championships next weekend, which I am soooo pumped for. Can't wait.

 

For those of you still stewing over my riddle...I'll recap and give ya the answer.

Q: So this guy goes to the market, and he walks up to the deli counter. He points at the worker's shin and says to him, "I'll take a pound of that." The deli-man, initially confused, slices it up and hands it over to the man. The man leaves the market and goes on his merry way. What did the guy leave with??

A: A pound of bologna!! ("below-knee"...deli, the shin...don't worry, I know it's terrible)

I think I'm going to start doing 2 blogs each week - one for team updates and another dedicated solely to the immortal Amanda LaRocca. This girl has now qualified for nationals in 5 events - the 55 hurdles, 55 dash, 4x4 relay, high jump, and pentathlon. That is just unheard of. I've come up with 3 possible explanations for her successes this season. First, the shedded time could be in part due to her shedded hair (she cut like 20 inches off at the beginning of the season). Second, she is no longer my roommate, so I'm no longer holding her back. Third, she's training really hard and stepping it up hardcore. Regardless what's responsible, it has been a very impressive season for her thus far.

 

Luckily, LaRocca isn't even close to being the only stud on the team right now. In our past 2 meets, we've had a ton of standout performances, with 1st place team finishes in both meets. Kerry Devitt never fails to thrill the crowd. At the Titan Open, she had a photo finish victory in the 5000m and smashed the school record. This past weekend at the Keck Invite, she had a super fast mile leg in the DMR (which we were less than a second short of provisionally qualifying for nationals in), a great 800 race, and was still able to show off with a blazing split in the 4x4. Unless you've witnessed it in person, you don't understand how quick her turnover is. I often wonder how ridiculously fast she'd be if she were the size of a normal person.

 

Competing in the pentathlon alongside LaRocca was Angela Oltman, who came just 2 lousy points away from provisionally qualifying for nationals. Still, she PR'd in multiple events, and I have no doubt in my mind that she'll leave that provisional mark in the dust in her next attempt at the pentathlon. Chinny Ekwulugo improved her national qualifying mark in the triple jump to hopefully secure her spot on the national performance list. At the Titan Open, the 800 crew dropped a lot of time for some HUGE PR's. Collectively, the hard work the team has been putting in these past few weeks has been reaping major payoffs. The countdown to the conference championships is on, and I know we're all getting giddy with anticipation.

 

The men's team also won the Titan Open, and they finished 5th of 13 teams in the Keck Invite. Wally Farris now has multiple school records to boast about, including the mile and 3000m. Noah Dunham (800) and Darien West (weight throw) both had 1st place finishes this past weekend, and Johnny Maloney put up some impressive marks in the men's pentathlon. Alex Lambert had an NCAA provo mark in the pole vault too! Very exciting stuff.

 

Monmouth round 2 is next on the schedule.  We're hoping to continue to improve our marks, move up the conference leader boards, and qualify some more people for nationals!

 

Two more things I'd like to add. First, I'd like to recognize our wonderful IWU trainers for doing a superb job keeping everybody alive at our meets. Second, in case you're not aware, IWU is home to the #1 nationally ranked women's basketball team. That's ballin.

 

Don't worry, I have 2 more jokes for you! The first is an alumni contribution from Jackie Wickham, and the second is yet another hilarious original joke from myself, Mackenzie Clemens. Enjoy :)

Q1: What is a basketball player's favorite state?

A1: New Jersey!

Q2: So this guy goes to the market, and he walks up to the deli counter. He points at the worker's shin and says to him, "I'll take a pound of that." The deli-man, initially confused, slices it up and hands it over to the man. The man leaves the market and goes on his merry way. What did the guy leave with??

A2: You'll have to check next week's blog for the answer to this one! I encourage guesses, but if you've heard this from me already, please keep your trap shut.

I apologize from the bottom of my heart for skipping a week of blogging, but now you get a DOUBLE ISSUE!

We competed at Rose Hulman on the 16th, and ended up with a 78-66 victory over Wash U (St. Louis). Indiana State and Illinois State competed in the meet as well, so we were able to run/jump/throw against a lot of quality athletes. Individually, we had some stellar performances to start off the year. Amanda "The Rock" LaRocca whipped out an automatic qualifying mark for nationals in the 55 hurdles with a time of 8.19 (also a school record). That's flying. In the 800m, I was able to squeeze out a provisional qualifying mark of 2:15.07, so that was exciting. Kerry Devitt posted up a 10:30.04 to capture the school record in the 3000m. Overall, we had 9 first place finishes on the women's side and 4 on the men's side. These included LaRocca (60 hurdles and 60 dash), Kyla Motz (weight throw and shot put), me (800), Gaby Johnson (high jump), Lauren Alpert (long jump), Ashley Heilengoetter (mile), Alicia McCoy (400), Darien West (weight throw - school record), Noah Dunham (800), Alex Lambert (pole vault), and Aaron Ball (400). On top of these accomplishments, we had numerous personal bests across the board. The most noteworthy event of the trip to Rose Hulman was the euchre showdown in which myself and Brandy Bird made Amanda LaRocca and Walter Kelley Farris never want to show their faces again. Coming back from a 1-9 deficit to claim an 11-9 victory is a testament to the power of dedication and perseverance. Life lesson learned. 

Last week got started with one of our most anticipated/despised workouts of the year...The Chase. In past years, I'd estimate that at least half of the team ended up with their heads in a toilet or trash can by the time the torture was over, but this year we sacked up and took it like champs (besides one chump, who I will spare from the embarrassment). The brutal training led us into our meet at Monmouth this past Saturday, where we finished 1^st of 5 teams. Once again, Amanda LaRocca exited the establishment with another school record and national qualifying mark, but this time in the 55m dash with a 7.17. Chinny Ekwulugo, Texan superstud, busted out a 38' 8.25" mark in the triple jump to also provisionally qualify for the national meet in March. Fellow Texan, Alicia McCoy, showed off her speed with her 1^st place finish in the 200m, an event that she took 3^rd in at last year's outdoor national meet. Other 1^st place finishes came from birthday girl Jessica Christy (300), Kerry Devitt (mile), me (800), Gaby Johnson (high jump - only 1 inch from qualifying for nationals), Lauren Alpert (long jump - also just an inch shy of qualifying), and the 4x400m relay in which Brooke Bernadoni made the crowd go wild with a come from behind win. The men's team trailed Augustana and Monmouth to finish 3^rd overall and received 1^st place finishes from Aaron Ball (200) and Noah Dunham (800).

 

Next up, we're competing on our home turf in the Titan Open on Saturday. For a taste of our training theme for the week please visit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLjY9B6UNrA. Any concerns should be directed to Coach Shoe.

 

Due to the numerous complaints from fans regarding the lack of jokes in the last entry, I've got another original joke for your entertainment purposes.

-Where do people from Illinois go when they're feeling depressed?

----They cross the border into a state of Missouri (misery...)

As predicted, the white team prevailed over the green team in our intrasquad meet this past weekend. I'd still like everybody to give a round of applause for the greenies as they ran, jumped, and threw their little hearts out. Seriously though, it was really nice to have a low-key and fun meet to start off the season. Track love is out in full force.

Since we are student-athletes, I should probably touch upon the academic aspect of IWU. We now have an entire week of classes under our belt for the semester. It's looking to be a challenging one, for me at least. My library pants will soon be making their first appearance of 2009.

Not only are we all bogged down with schoolwork already, but we're also experiencing a modern-day ice age. I've already broken 3 ice scrapers this winter, so that's been fun.

Onto more important matters, my birthday is on the 17th. I will be accepting gifts. Possibly even more exciting, the Lost Season 5 premiere is next week! Yay. Oh yeah, and Rachel Anderson Lyons, the 2008 NCAA D3 Women's Track Athlete of the Year will be making her return to IWU this weekend :)

We'll be competing next at Rose Hulman on Friday. It's the site of this year's Indoor NCAA Championships, so we'll hopefully be getting a taste of what's to come in March :)  I'll let you know how we fare.

Yo. Just a little intro - I'm Mackenzie Clemens, a junior biology major at Illinois Wesleyan University in the exciting town of Bloomington, IL, home of Beer Nuts. We're coming off of our best season in the history of IWU Track and Field after bringing home the team's first CCIW conference title and the school's first women's national championships. It was a fairly exciting year for us...

To start the season, we had an early December meet against 2 other CCIW teams, Millikin and North Park. It provided a good insight into what we should expect for the rest of the year. We also held our annual Track Ugly Christmas Sweater Competition, in which I'd like to again congratulate Amy Burns for her outstanding and surprising performance.

So this week we're really getting underway with our '09 season. After the successes we had last year, we definitely have a lot to live up to and a lot to look forward to. Our first focus will be shedding our "holiday butts," as the almighty Brandy Bird likes to put it. We'll be putting in a lot of hard work on the track and in the weight room this week to get back in shape after the break.

We have an intrasquad meet this weekend, white team vs. green team...but the white team will no doubt be running away with the victory :)  Overall, the team is looking solid, with great leadership and experience from the returners and incredible talent with the new freshies. Unfortunately, we'll be missing our amazing seniors from last year. They've left us some very large shoes to fill.

As a treat to my thousands, maybe millions, of readers, I'll leave you with some Mackenzie Clemens-original jokes. You have never heard these anywhere before, and they have been copyrighted, so please don't pawn them off as your own. I hope you like Laffy Taffy-style humor...
-What do you call a pig that likes to eat bacon?
-----HAMmibal Lector (like Hannibal...get it? Hilarious, I know)
-What did the vegetarian get his girlfriend for Valentine's Day?
-----CauliFlowers!

Sorry.